Starting a blog!

This is terrifying yet satisfying to my inner child.

Being a writer is my top secret far fetched dream. Top secret as in my own mother didn't know. Far fetched because I was in the BOTTOM set in secondary school for English. My grammar, spelling and reading was terrible. Still is! And I read books...I do try. Spell check was my life saver through University. How can I be a writer when I'm not good at English?!
Blogging didn't exist when I was in school, I'm talking about book authors. Until Carrie Bradshaw of course. So I followed a more realistic path. Well I say realistic...it was still a distant dream as you kind of need to be good at English to be a primary school teacher. Back then a pass was good enough. So I worked hard and went to university. I was never really good at a subject in school. I enjoyed art and sports until I hit puberty (the sick notes came in handy for my moody blushing hairy self). So fining a career from something I enjoy and was good at was difficult. But then my little sister was born when I was 13 years old. I adored her. I still do. I think that's why I landed on the teaching path. My passion for teaching came from my love for her. I was unaware that love could be so strong and can pull you into different paths. When I had my first son I soon gave up on my career. The thought of missing his first words, steps or sports days was unbearable. So I happily became a stay at home mum. But being skint is miserable. Money doesn't make you happy of course but it does make life easier. Now I don't need the finer things in life. I only need to eat. So I started my own business walking dogs for some extra cash after I had my second baby boy. I absolutely adore dogs and there are three in the family. This is perfect. Our dogs get walked. I earn some extra cash. I'm only away an hour or two a day from my sons.  Its a win win. Except for the dog shit. Just imagine...I walked up to five on a pack walk.

I've found the courage to start a blog that I've secretly wanted to do for over a year now just because of one single person. My friend Sophie who I met at University emailed me on facebook and basically said to start a blog. How did she know my deepest desire?! I read somewhere that it takes 3 positive comments to erase a negative one. I don't agree. For me personally it only took one person to erase a hundred negative thoughts in my head.
For about two years now I've found the world of blogging and vlogging. I was watching Loose Women and the guest was beauty vlogger/ blogger Zoella. I was instantly intrigued by her. I started to watch her videos and the rest is history. I'm hooked. I don't watch much TV anymore. I am either on youtube or reading blogs. So after a year my desire to join the blogger world kept creeping up. To a point I would pretend I had a blog and write posts in my notes on my phone while nursing the baby to sleep. THE NEXT DAY I would delete the whole page and tut at myself.

As much as I'd like to say I don't care what people think or say. I do. I human. I'm a cancer star sign we wear our hearts on our sleeves. So how am I going to deal with putting myself out there?!
One of my favourite YouTubers said that she doesn't take things personally from people that don't know her personally. So I will be trying to keep that in mind. The only thing ...even people who know you personally will judge you.
LET THEM!
There is nothing I can do about that. They will judge no matter what I do. I shouldn't do something I desperately want in fear of a negative reaction. This is my life its too short. The people that really matter to me are very supportive. That's all that matters.


What I love about blogs is that they inspire me. From cooking, make up and craft making with my kids. My absolute favourite blogs are from mums who say it how it is. They are hysterical and make me feel so much better about my ups and downs being a mother. So if I can inspire even just one person in return that will be like winning the lotto. I have no idea what I'm planning on writing but here it is. My first Blog post. My first piece of writing online.

This is just a hobby I'm starting up. I'm not trying to be a professional writer or anything. I just love Blogs. So while the kids are in bed and I'm waiting on the new episodes of The Walking Dead and PLL. I'll be here writing. Some people like a game of online bingo...I like blogging (shrug)

Thanks for reading and joining me on this journey xxx